Hugs

I'm not a touchy feely person by nature. Although, if I know you well enough, I feel more comfortable letting you in my bubble. It's not that I don't like human contact or that I don't crave it sometimes. It's more that I'm not sure how something as simple as a touch on the arm will be reacted to. I guess this is as good a time as any to also state that I'm an over-thinker. But that's a post for another day.

Normally there are two people I hug on a regular basis... my mom and my dad. It's pretty obvious why they get hugs. They are my parents after all. But they're usually the only ones I ever initiate hugs with. I don't feel comfortable enough to hug most other people unless they instigate it. This is sort of a sore spot for me. Inside, I don't mind hugging and general affection. Inside, I like to know that people care about me and express it with outward signs of hugs and such. But outside, I'm too concerned that it won't be welcomed. That it won't be wanted. I wish I wasn't this way. I want to be friendly and affection (to the right people). I just have a hard time expressing it.

I'm not really sure what brought this on. Maybe it was the influx of non-parental hugs? Maybe I just like to talk about myself and my issues? Who knows? I simply find it interesting.

Only I could ruin a cookie mix

I was unexpectedly invited to a friend's family dinner/gathering. I had about an hour and a half before the gathering and I felt that I should show up with something. (This stems from my family gathering which are potluck and people bring food with them.) Unfortunately, it was Sunday and I don't shop on Sunday. Thankfully though, my sister-in-law had a box of cookie mix that she gratefully donated to my cause.

I have the box and I pull out the ingredients: an egg and a tablespoon of butter. Easy enough right? ...Wrong. I didn't read the instructions well enough before I threw the butter in and then cracked the egg over top. That's when I saw the tablespoon of softened butter. Whoops. I forgot to soften the butter. Now, before you shake your head and judge me for not knowing to soften the butter before throwing it into the mix, let me defend myself. I don't bake much. Heck, I don't cook much. I'm pretty much only good for cleaning when in the kitchen. So, I was standing here with a bowl of cookie mix, egg, and a lump of butter. How was I supposed to mix this up? Was it completely ruined? Then I stuck my (clean) hands in and started mixing up the dough... well what was supposed to be dough.

The cookies are edible. They don't look like much but they can be eaten. And I plopped them on a paper plate, covered it with foil, and jumped in my car. I pulled up to the house to see some people getting out... but they had no food containers. They didn't bring any food. I sat for a moment, debating within myself: take in the cookies or leave them in my car. Hmm...

I left them in the car. I wasn't going to show up with some half-baked (metaphorically) cookies when no one else brought anything. I'd rather go in empty handed than embarrass myself.

What did I learn from this experience? Keep my own stock of baked good mixes (No offense Suzanne) on hand and read the directions more carefully. Also, be prepared to show up empty handed but try to be thoughtful and bring something. Did that make sense? So maybe... I didn't learn much more than to read directions more carefully. I was just like the people I mock often who don't read the directions or the closed signs. That's something for me to improve.

Until Next Time,

The Hopeless Romantic

The Friend Zone

I was reading another blog the other day and I read this post about Criminal Minds. You should know by now that I'm a huge BONES fan but I'm also a big fan of Criminal Minds. [Brief side-note: I watched a lot of reruns of Criminal Minds this last summer and started having dreams about the show... those dreams started turning kind of really freaky. So I banned myself from watching it for awhile.] I'm now back to watching it when I can.

Anyway, back to the blog I was reading. The author, who happens to be my favorite author, wrote a post about Criminal Minds. More specifically how she'd like Morgan (the ultra hot, ultra tough FBI guy) to plant a big wet one (a kiss) on the the computer nerd [Penelope] Garcia (who happens to be extremely gifted in the arts of hacking). Now, for you who are not familiar with this show, a little background.

Morgan is extremely attractive, confident, and amazing at his job. Garcia is a great hacker, has a funky and quirky fashion sense and is... not your typical size 4 supermodel. She's normal but extremely pretty. And she is also amazingly good at her job. They flirt, Morgan and Garcia. A lot.

Can you sense the big BUT coming? I can... even though I'm the one writing this so I should be able to... okay not the point. But... they're also really good friends. Too good of friends. So good of friends you really can't imagine them crossing THAT line. They're hopelessly and irrevocably stuck in the Friend Zone.

The Friend Zone is dangerous to try and get out of. If you cross outside the boundaries of the F Zone (Friend Zone) there's a chance one person or both persons will get hurt and it's hard to get back inside. It doesn't matter if both wish to get out of the F Zone, once you cross that line... there's no going back. And Morgan and Garcia... they're not only friends... they're co-workers. The line is even thicker. It's most likely never gonna happen but...

I'm the hopeless romantic here. I can dream right. So, in my head, here's how it goes down:

After a particularly long case, Morgan enters Garcia's office where she is finishing up some work. He spins her chair around and doesn't say a word. He leans down and plants one right on her kisser, thus leaving her stunned and shocked. And they live happily ever after. The End.

 Ha ha ha. I read this and think that I am a total dork. But I love it!

Just so you know. The Criminal Minds isn't character driven like BONES is. They focus more on the cases than the people but in a good way. It's a case driven show that has great characters to support it. If you like crime-y shows I highly recommend this one. It's great!

Until next time, I'll be here waiting. Just like the Hopeless Romantic that I am.

February 15th: Not too hot. Not too cold.

I wore my jacket today. With out a coat. That may not seem like a big deal but it really is. It's only the middle of February and it's already 53 degrees outside. That's unusual for northern Utah. But it feels FANTASTIC! I'm loving it. I parked at the park and walked up to campus instead of taking the bus. Why waste time on the bus when I can feel the warm sunshine and the cold-ish breeze upon my face?

I stopped in at my place of employment to talk about some tax related stuff. Got it figured out. Bought TWO donuts, a chocolate milk, and an apple. A guy with pretty blue eyes winked at me. I walked out of the store with a smile on my face and an old, dying Valentines Day balloon. I saw an old work friend on campus and we talked for awhile. Then I skipped my most hated class.

Tonight I'm going to see The Music Man, my most favorite musical ever, with a friend.

Today... is a good day. Today is B-E-A-utiful!

Ten Friends on a Camping Trip

Today my mom gave me my first pair of rain boots. I've wanted rain boots for.. ever. I just never could bring myself to get some. Usually by the time I decided to get some the weather had warmed up and they weren't necessary. Finally I have some. All it took was my mom purchasing them in DC, stuffing them into her suitcase, and flying home to Utah. No problem at all.

Why do I need rain boots? I don't necessarily need rain boots. It doesn't rain all that much here. There's snow but I have a decent pair of just regular boots. But sometimes it gets slushy and yucky out there. Plus I think rain boots are the greatest. It's the little kid in me. The same person that loves to color and secretly wants to still play with Barbies. I want to put these rain boots on and go jump in some puddles.

Anyone want to join me?

Oh just shut up already!

Okay, so I promise that my blog isn't going to become some sort of demented fan blog. But I just have to say this and get it out there.

I watch Bones. I love Bones. In the last year, I've started to get involved with the fan world. I joined Twitter mostly to connect to other people who are fans. My family practically mocks me because of my obsession with this show. (Actually full on mock me.) I've become a die hard fan. And I'm with this show until the end.

So it makes it really hard to read comments left on reviews left by Negative Nancys and Debbie Downers. Maybe I'm a perpetual optimist or a hopeless fool but I'm not unhappy with the path of the show. I understand that everyone is entitled to their opinion and I'm not saying they can't express those opinions. What I'm most upset about is the same people who keep whining about the show. They say they've been unhappy for the entire season. I ask: Why are you still watching it if you hate it so much?! I mean, if I don't like something and I have the power to leave, I'm going to leave. I'm going to walk away and find something that I like better.

I hate reading these comments because afterward I feel down. This is when I decided to take my own advice. No more reading the comments. No more feeling down because some girl in Cincinnati (hypothetical situations- didn't really happen) doesn't like the way the show is going.

On that note: Bones is a fictional show created by real people who are human. You can't realistically expect it to be perfect or completely consistent. And they're not writing it to please just you- the fan. They have to please the network and to get rating. It's not all about you. So just shut up already if you don't like what Booth did and what Brennan didn't do or some plot device. It's a show. If you don't like it, stop watching it. If you keep watching it stop making such negative remarks about it. If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.

Whew. Okay. I'm done. I have that out in the open and as with all rants I feel better getting it off my chest. Now I'll go back to writing my usual redundant drivel and you can go back to rolling your eyes at my obsession.

Until next time (if there is a next one after this post).

Look Me in the Eyes: An Extremely Fanfictiony Tribute

Just a warning. This is an extremely fan-fictiony tribute. If you're not into dorky stuff like this... don't proceed any further. Don't worry, this won't be a normal occurrence.

If you know me at all, you know that I am a HUGE fan of Fox's dramedy BONES. This song was pointed out to me some time ago and I really liked it a lot.I didn't think much of it for awhile and then awhile back I started listening to it more. That's when I got the idea for this post.

Lately, I've been wanting to bring the song and the show together as a whole as opposed to the single episode where the song originally airs. I'm not one for videos, being more of a word person, so I decided to dedicate a post on my personal blog to the cause.

So for your viewing/reading pleasure... I present 'Rain or Shine' by Matthew Perryman Jones in picture (and lyric) form.

Look me in the eyes
Tell me you don't feel a thing
Look me in the eyes
Tell me you don't feel a thing
I'm laying out my heart
and giving you everything

If it all goes wrong
are you just gonna walk away
If it all goes wrong
are you just gonna walk away
Well, get it out now
and say what you need to say

 
I'm gonna love you
baby, come rain or shine
I'm gonna love you
baby, come rain or shine
No one can love you
love you as good as I

 
I made up my mind
I refuse to let you go
I made up my mind
I refuse to let you go
lay it all on the line
this time we can take it slow

I'm gonna love you
baby, come rain or shine
I'm gonna love you
baby, come rain or shine
No one can love you
love you as good as I

 

Let's live it like we're not afraid
Like it's never gonna fade away
Don't treat it like another day
Let's live it like we're not afraid



P.S. If you want to listen to the actually song, check it out on Youtube here:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rTiFZ5Pk09g

P.S.S The song is found in the BONES episode titled The Dwarf in the Dirt. Just in case you were wondering.

Pick Up That Chunk!

This is basically a shout-out to my favorite-est Mommy in the whole world... mine!

I was at work looking down at my pants and thinking that they looked a little wrinkly. That's weird because I fold my pants and hang them in my closet. That's when I was struck with the thought that I actually fold my laundry. I know. You're thinking... duh! Of course you fold your laundry. You just don't understand.

As an extremely emotional teenager (Sorry Mom and Dad) I HATED laundry. Granted, when I did laundry at this time it was for four brothers and my parents. That's a lot of laundry, especially compared to these days when it's just my own and I do it like once a week. Anyway, the point is that I've never really thought about NOT folding my laundry. I don't know if I'm subconsciously still trying to seek my mother's approval or if it's just been so much a part of my routine that I don't think about it.

This leads me to think of other things that I do. Like vacuuming and cleaning the bathroom and doing dishes. I don't quite do them like I used to when I lived with my parents but I still do them. I'm particular about things that are TOTALLY my mother in me. Like dish cloths... they're good for like a day and then they need to be washed. Showers... are to be taken everyday. Beds are to be made in the mornings before leaving (Yeah, I still make my bed because my Mom always wanted me to.) Clothes pulled from the dryer are to be folded immediately so they don't get wrinkly. Certain shirts are to be ironed- not left wrinkly from the dryer. (Yeah, I believe in ironing my nice shirts and my skirts and anything else that requires ironing.)

That's not to say that I do everything all the time. I usually think about it and then put it off for awhile. But the point is that eventually I get to it. It makes me laugh because when I was the emotional teenager from a few years ago I never thought there'd be a point in my life when I'd care about stuff like this.

I never even imagined that I'd want to have a clean house. That I'd want my clothes to look neat and ironed and folded in my drawers. That I'd want to pick up the chunks from the middle of the floor. I never imagined that I would turn into my mother. ... And I'm okay with it. I'm okay with being my mother. She's taught me more than I ever expected. There are some days when I do something and I realize... my mom does the exact same thing.

So Mom, if you're reading this, thanks. For everything. For riding on my butt over not keeping my room clean and for not doing the laundry the way you wanted (especially folding your towels right. ha ha.) Thanks for teaching me how to take care of myself. Thanks for loving an emotional girl who never understood why you wanted the chunk picked up off the floor.

You never realize what you appreciate until you don't have it around anymore. Thanks for everything Mom! Love you!

If I wanted reality...

A few weeks ago I read an article written about a particular show that I watch. Basically the author was pointing out about how in real life, stuff that happens in the show wouldn't happen in real life. I won't go into detail because it doesn't matter.

The point is that after reading the article I commented to the author that although I agree with him, that didn't mean that I wanted this show to be more realistic.  I watch it for the un-realism of it. I think that most people watch TV and movies for the un-realism in them.


We instinctively want to get outside of our own lives and see something different, exciting, not us. It's the same as reading fiction books. We don't read to learn about human nature. We read to escape into a different world, a different life.

That's not to say that we want a TV show to be totally unrealistic. Just sort of unrealistic. Enough unrealistic elements to make the show entertaining but not far-fetched. If you want a totally far-fetched show watch the sci-fi channel. For most of us (in my opinion), we just want an escape from the hum-drum regularity of our lives. We want someone else' life for the space of 30 to 60 minutes. And then we can come back to reality.

As I told the author of this article in my comment (in a kind way, mind you) if I wanted realistic, I'd watch the news.